I'm pretty sure almost everyone has gone through at least one period where everything seemed to be going wrong, where you felt like it was the end of the world, and you just don't want to go on anymore... I know, a little melodramatic, but I'm sure we've all been there at least once.
I know this past week has been just one thing on top of another, for me. But with the help of my boyfriend and friends, I have managed to get back on my feet so I can keep going.
My question is... What do you do when your SO is feeling this way? But not just once in a blue moon. Every time something goes wrong, they make it seem like the end of the world.
My boyfriend is like this, and it can sometimes be exhausting. I know for a fact that, as a person, he's a bit of a cynic, and tends to get depressed easily. Not that he's an unhappy person around me, mind you. We're a very happy couple most of the time and enjoy each other's company immensely. But when things go wrong, he gets really upset.
Whenever I get upset (whether it's with him or just because... I'm not unreasonable, but I can't always be happy), he says he feels like all he does is upset me and that he can't make me happy.
Just to give you a more specific idea... He recently had to get the clutch replaced in his car, which cost $500. He lives on his own and had to pay for it himself, which isn't easy, considering he's living from paycheck to paycheck. He very reluctantly accepted my help in paying for this (he ended up needing only $20), but let me know that he'd be tight for money for the next three months.
That happened a little under three weeks ago. Today, he got a ticket on his way to work and ended up being late as a result. Money being tight, I think he got really upset, figured he couldn't pay it and texted me saying he just wanted to give up. I always offer to pay for things if he's tight for money, since I live at home and can lend him money from my savings, knowing he'll pay me back. He just really hates to accept that from me.
My problem is, whenever things like this happen, I feel like it's my responsibility to make him feel better and assure him things will be okay. I'm okay with cheering people up. It's just frustrating when you're dealing with a pessimist, who you love. And when I can't make him feel better, I feel like I'm failing as a girlfriend.
Beyond that, I'm burned out, and just don't know if I can be the strong one right now... It's been one helluva week for me, too.
How do you handle when things get tough?
Comments (3)
My boyfriend has times like this, when things just seem hopeless & everything, and all I can really do is comfort him and be there for him.
It's hard when I'm tired and feeling the same way, but I gotta be strong for him when he's down, because he needs that.
@steph - Yep I know... And I really do have it much easier than him, so I really try to be strong. I think, with talking, we're getting the hang of dealing with problems as they come. :)
With both an attitude change on his end, and a little more understanding on mine... Mostly what bothered me is that he always wanted to give up in the face of problems, and never saw that there would be better days and life would go on, but he's started to look towards the future, and is really making an effort to sort things out so he can make it all work.
@turtletastic - Good :) Glad things are looking up!